Mix It Up L.A.

5 Ways to Eliminate Small Talk Posted on January 28, 2011 by Kim Lockhart If you dread the idea of a boring first date, here are 5 ways to make it, at the very least, a pleasant use of your time. 1. Make it fun for YOU – Think about the conversation as if it’s a treasure hunt. Your goal is to discover that which is interesting, funny or unexpected about the person sitting in front of you. Everyone has something interesting to offer, even if it’s simply wild passion for something random like 28 different ways to use BBQ sauce. 2. Do not exchange data – The stats about your life – where you grew up, where you’ve traveled, went to college – are not that interesting. They’re not conversation “jumping off” points unless someone has had the exact same experience. Share your PASSION. Enthusiasm is contagious and endearing. Be a real human being. 3. Create the unexpected – At a minimum, please do not meet for coffee. It’s a setup for boredom and zero chemistry. Take a stroll in a beautiful environment, walk a dog that needs to be adopted, or at least grab some snacks and sit outside in the sun while enjoying life in LA. 4. Surprise them with unexpected questions. Here are some of our favorites. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? What did you want to be when you were 5 years old? What is your life’s passion? 5. If you REALLY want to be adventurous, do this! In an experiment done by Professor Arthur Arun, participants felt deeply attracted to each other after doing the following for 34 minutes. 1. Set up a date with a stranger. 2. Reveal to each other intimate details about your lives for half an hour. 3. Then, stare deeply into each other’s eyes without talking for four minutes. Two of his subjects later got married. Why not try it yourself! Questions or comments? Email kim@mixitupla.com		The secret to creating and keeping love Last week's article 3 Huge Reasons I'd Rather Be With My Working-Class Boyfriend Than a Rich Guy rang so true that I wish... Click here to read more The big debate: Is love supposed to be easy? Or hard? There’s a ton of conflicting opinion about what love is “supposed” to be. Lots of people say marriage is hard work, so expect that it’s going to require serious effort. Others say “When it’s the right person, it’s simple.” So putting in too much effort should be a red flag... Click here to read more When to use Facebook, when to text, and when to call My friend’s brother asked about a tricky situation. He was at a fundraiser, and met a girl through a mutual acquaintance. There was definite chemistry… Click here to read more Are some people “hopeless at love?” Yesterday a friend asked me if I thought that some people are “just hopeless at love” and destined never to get married… Click here to read more It Only Takes 5 Minutes As a matchmaker, I spend a lot of time noticing people and wondering about who they are. But it’s rare that I see a stranger and think… Click here to read more Why You Should Date Short Men As a smart, capable woman, if the only thing that you wanted in a relationship was physical safety, then a tall man would be the only choice. Click here to read more What to know when you go out socially to meet men What holds us back is that we don’t realize how appreciative men are of the many, many attractive things about women. Thinking of our beauty from their point of view will… Click here to read more Why Long Distance Should be Kept at a Distance Hi. My name is Amy and I am a pathological long-distance dater. Well, I used to be... Click here to read more